


ready to see

by mea_culpa



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: AU, Angst, F/F, M/M, Oblivious Harry, colourblind, magical happenings, struggle with sexuality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-10-29
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2017-11-17 07:14:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/548980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mea_culpa/pseuds/mea_culpa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing about Harry is, he sees in shades and tones. Everything is a different shade of grey or white, like an old 1940’s film. And he’s ok with that because he’s never known any different. Until one day, something happens. He meets someone that changes everything.</p><p>*NOT AN UPDATE BUT AN IMPORTANT NOTE! SORRY!*</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is my little baby. It's the story I always wanted to write but never knew I could. It's the story that plaques my thoughts at night and it's the story I want to get right so badly I'm scared to put fingers to keys.  
> I hope I do it justice. I hope you like it.
> 
> I hope that at this point it's obvious I own nothing but my own insanity.

Prologue

The thing about Harry is he sees in shades and tones. Everything is a different shade of grey or white, like an old 1940’s film. He’s always been that way and didn’t know any different until people started referring to things in term of colour. For the longest time he thought blue was light and green was dark all because everyone made obvious observations about the sky and the grass. He knew what they were so it all made sense. At least to him.

In primary school he used to get teased about what he wore; mostly outfits consisting of awful combination such as purple jeans and lime green shirts. Of course as far as Harry was aware most of the time he wore dark jeans and a light top or vice versa. Really it's his mother fault, the bullying, because she should never have let him leave the house like he did. She said, in her defence, she thought he was just trying to express himself. 

In fairness Harry didn’t tell her about not seeing colours until just a few years ago.

He actually only told her because he kept getting in trouble. Anne, his mother, is a party planner by trade which meant the house was always strewn with different fabrics and props and on occassion Harry liked to help her while she worked. When, one day, for the fifth time, he had come back with something other than the red napkins she'd asked for, he thought he ought to tell her that he probably wouldn’t ever get it right no matter how many times she sent him back. Plus he would have done anything to stop the weird shade her face was turning.

Anne took it as any mother would. He was subjected to numerous specialists and had numerous tests and the best they could come up with was that he was colour blind. Which, ok that made sense. He couldn’t see colours so he was colour blind. What didn’t make sense to Harry was that he was the only person they knew of that was colour blind in that particular way. Most people that suffered with the condition had trouble discriminating between one colour and another, like red and green or blue and yellow. Some could see the colours but couldn’t process what they were seeing. So really, technically, he is the only person on record that is actually colour _blind_ and he’s ok with that, he’s never known anything else.

But sometimes, often late at night when he is about to go to sleep, he wonders. He wonders what colour the toppings on his pizza are (telling him cheese is yellow and peppers are red doesn’t really mean anything to him) and he would love to know what colour his eyes are or the colour of the curls on his head. He’s been told they are the same colour as chocolate but what does that even mean? What colour is chocolate? What _is_  brown?

Most of the time he doesn’t let himself think about it too much because he’s happy. He has great friends and a good family, albeit an over bearing mother and self-absorbed sister, so he really has nothing to complain about.

You can’t miss what you’ve never had.

But then one day, something happens to Harry. He meets someone that changes everything. They change the way he see things, what he believes in. They make him see _colour_. They make him question why.

Why now was he suddenly ready to see?


	2. Chapter One

Harry rifled through his wardrobe trying to find a shirt to go with his dark skinny jeans. His mum had organised it carefully so that he wouldn’t have any more colour-clash incidents and then, just to be on the safe side, he had had his best-friend Niall fix any fashion mistakes she may have made.

He chose a plain t-shirt that was light in tone and labelled grey. He had told his mum he didn’t need the little stickers, what did a name mean to him? But she insisted so he let her. Slipping the fabric over his head he shook out his hair and made his way to his en-suite bathroom, looking in the mirror just as his bedroom door swung open and Niall bustled in.

“Hurry up Haz!” Niall tapped his foot impatiently and shook his bright blond head. He had been waiting for Harry downstairs before deciding to hurry him up himself.

“One more minute!” he replied, caressing his fingers through his distressed curls.

“That’s what you said fifteen minutes ago,” Niall was lying, Harry knew it hadn’t been that long, “the lads will be waiting.”

“Then let them wait! I’m not exactly in a rush to start back at school!” he shook his hair one more time and it was as good as it was going to get. He had put enough product in to hold it for the day.

“Yeah, but you know what Li is like.” Harry rolled his eyes. Liam loved school and hated anything that tarnished his good reputation, including being late. Harry didn’t care either way. He did his work as and when he needed to but really he just wanted to get through his last year of sixth form and get away to university.

“Come on then.” He grabbed his bag and motioned for Niall to follow him out the door, acting as though he had been the one waiting all along. His friend groaned but followed easily. They were supposed to meet Liam and Zayn on the corner ten minutes ago. Not that Harry’s stride gave their tardiness away. He was well known for his carefree attitude, amongst other things.

Liam glared as they approached five minutes later and Harry didn’t need to see the colour of his eyes to know they were shining with impatience.

“We’re going to be late? Was your hair really worth it?” Harry just laughed and nudged his friend as he passed him. Of course it was. The four of them had been friends for too many years for him to take offence from anything they said. In actuality he rarely took offence from anything that was said to him and that was something his friends envied.

With a deep, reverent sigh Liam followed behind his late friend while Niall and Zayn brought up the rear. The four of them had met during their first year of secondary school, all having tried out for the football team but ending up in choir instead. Which said as much for their talent with a football as it did for their voices.

They chatted as they made their way to the college campus, which was just a short walk from their meeting place, and despite Liam’s worrying, they had plenty of time to get to their registration groups and pick up their new timetables for the year.

The campus was an old Georgian house that had been converted. So although the inside was stark cream walls and old classroom furniture, the facade itself was imposing and beautiful. It was possible that in shades and tones it was more magnificent to Harry’s eyes than any other. There was a large green at the front where some students were already sitting in small, well established groups.

Liam checked his watch for the fourth time as they stood outside the main doors agreeing to meet at lunch if they hadn’t had any classes together before then. “We should probably go guys,” he urged and the group split into two. Niall and Liam headed in one direction while Harry and Zayn, who were in the same group, headed in the other.

“Did you hear about Mandy?” Zayn asked as they walked down the packed corridor. Mandy was a girl in their choir group. She was nice but spent most of the allotted hour staring at Harry dreamily. He didn’t mind, a lot of girls stared at him and he stared at a lot of girls, but he’d never been interested enough to make conversation with or about her.

“Nope.” Harry answered, popping the p.

“The word in the halls is she hooked up with Josh Barker over the summer.”

“That’s great,” He replied dryly and hitched his bag higher on his shoulder. He made a point to ignore Zayn’s incredulous stare.

“Do you not realise how hot she is? Why you didn’t take advantage of her adulation I don’t know!”

“Adulation eh? Have you been reading over the summer? That’s a big word for you!” He grinned at his own sarcasm and laughed into the nudge he got in return.

“Shut up!”

“No really, I’m proud!” Zayn chose to ignore him as was best whenever Harry’s wit decided to make an appearance. They walked the rest of the way to b block in silence, only speaking to say hello to acquaintances they passed on their way. As they stepped into room 14 Harry surveyed the room until he saw what he was looking for.

“Hey, Zayn, what colour is Holly’s flower?” He gestured with a flip of his head to a girl standing by the window. She was beautiful, all long limbs and natural tan. Harry had liked her for a all of last year and was determined to get closer to her, the fact that she had been dating Connor Hensley for nearly two years didn’t matter to him.

“It’s red.” Zayn answered before moving to find his seat. The boys were used to answering questions like that for Harry. It helped him piece the world together a little to know that the leaves on trees were the same colour as the grass, and tomatoes and radishes were both red. It also helped him hit on pretty girls. His friends were surprisingly good wing-men.

Harry sauntered over to Holly with a confident sway to his hips, girls liked it when he paid attention to them and he planned on using that to his advantage. “Hey Holly, good summer?” He grinned charmingly and was rewarded with a keen smile in return.

“It was great thanks Harry, you? Do anything exciting?” Harry scoffed quietly, not likely, when you had an overly worried mother like he did there was little chance for excitement. Apart from hanging around with the boys he hadn’t done anything to get excited over. Although there was that one time Niall raided his dad’s liquor cupboard but he doubted she’d want to hear about that.

“This and that, I love the flower. Red suits you.” He reached forward and flicked a petal lying just above her left breast. Holly gave him a strange look before laughing, tossing back her auburn hair and pushing at Harry’s shoulder playfully.

“Your such a tease Harry Styles. I thought you were serious for a minute.” He laughed along and decided that that would be a good moment to find his seat. It was behind Zayn, as it had been last year, who was laughing into his hand.

“What colour was it really?” He asked his friend with a resigned sigh.

“Yellow!”

Harry pushed out a hand and punched Zayn firmly on the centre of his bicep. “Arsehole!”

Zayn’s cry of pain was extremely satisfying and Harry vowed to only ask Liam and Niall colour questions from that point on. He really should have known that Zayn wasn’t to be trusted.

After registration, new timetable in hand, Harry sat though his welcome back classes for History and Sociology. Neither of his friends were in the same group but he knew enough people to have someone to talk to while passing the time. There was a new kid in his Sociology group that everyone was excitedly talking about but he hadn’t been able to get a good look at him through the crowd. Not that he was too worried about new people, he was happy with his four close friends and circle of acquaintances. 

The foursome met up at lunch as they did every day. They had a nice spot they had claimed the year before behind the science building. Not many people knew it was there and those that did weren’t up for climbing a fence to get to it, which suited them just fine. They liked the quiet.

As they ate they compared timetables and found that Harry had English Lit with Liam and a free period with Niall, while Zayn and Liam shared art on Wednesday’s and Niall and Zayn shared P.E on Tuesday’s and Friday’s. Other than that they only shared one class all together. Choir.

“Can you believe they’ve put choir at the end of the day! Every day! We’ve got no half days at all this year! That’s ridiculous! That should be illegal!” Zayn waved his sandwich in the air as he finished his rant and Liam took the boys schedule to look for anything to placate him with.

“Look, Thursday’s you don’t have to be in until 1, that’s not so bad.” Zayn continued to grumble but the issue was moot. There was nothing they could do about it. It wasn’t ideal but they knew when they signed up that taking the class was a huge commitment and honestly Harry didn’t mind at all because the more chances he got to sing the happier he was.

“Speaking of, there was a new kid in registration, seems nice and he’s going to join us in choir.” Niall informed them over a mouth full of food.

“You’re picking up another stray? Don’t you remember Brian?” All four boys groaned as Harry reminded them of the disaster that was Brian, a boy Niall had befriended in Year 9. It wasn’t something they liked to think about and they were glad they managed to get away from him when they did. They had been heading for a horror movie ending with that one. Harry shivered at the thought.

“He’s not a Brian! He seems nice and looks normal!” Niall defended.

“I had a new guy in Sociology, maybe it was the same guy?” Harry shrugged and popped a piece of pineapple into his mouth. There had been a time when he was a kid that he had refused to eat anything in that particular shade. He was glad to have grown out of that phase as a lot of foods he liked were the same non-colour.

“Red pants? Stripy top?” Niall asked and when Harry raised an eyebrow at him he realised his mistake. It was so easy for his friends to forget about his condition sometimes. Harry shrugged and the boys let it slide while they ate and Zayn was prompted to recount Harry’s exchange with Holly.

The rest of the afternoon passed quickly enough for Harry. He didn’t mind days wherein he practically did nothing and wasn’t looking forward to the workload they had threatened him with.

He was the first of the four to get to the music room but the others quickly appeared and met him in the corner where they piled their things together. They stood in a circle to start their vocal warm-ups and the room quickly filled with bodies and noise.

In the middle of a lip stretch Niall broke form and pointed to the doorway. “There he is! I’ll go bring him over!” Niall was the most social of the bunch and they were used to his enthusiasm when meeting new people. Harry didn’t mind meeting him but as far as he was concerned there was no space in their foursome for a fifth.

They stood watching as their chatty friend gained the new guy's attention. They shared smiles before Niall gestured to the group and started herding him over. Whoever the new kid was he hadn’t stood a chance against Niall.

“Guys this is Louis, the guy I was telling you about. Louis this is Zayn, Liam and Harry.” Louis grinned broadly and nodded a greeting but Harry wasn’t paying attention. Instead he was frozen, eyes wide and heart beating wildly. He could feel it thumping in his throat as air fought to pass on its way to his lungs.

This wasn’t his usual reaction when meeting someone new. No, not at all. However this was different. This meeting had Harry in awe, shocked to the centre of his core because something had happened. Something wasn’t right. He stared as the others chatted and he tried to make sense of what he was feeling, what he saw when he looked into Louis’ eyes. Because something was there, something he’d never seen before.

He pinched quietly at Liam’s elbow until he had his attention. “What is it Harry?”

“What colour are Louis’ eyes?” He choked on the words as they passed his lips and although Liam could tell that his friend's demeanour was off, he said nothing.

“Blue.” Harry nodded at the answer. Wow.

So that’s the colour of the sky.


	3. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry - I had hoped it would come out better than it did but hopefully it will be worth the ridiculously long wait!  
> Thank you for sticking with me!  
> x

Blue. 

Harry played with the word as he stared. 

Blue. 

As in the colour. A real colour that he was seeing for the very first time. 

Blue. 

The actual colour of the sky. The colour of a good proportion of the clothes in his wardrobe. 

Blue.

Blue.

A manic laugh pushed it's way from his chest and he turned it quickly into a cough. However it was still enough to catch the attention of the group.

"Harry? You alright?" Zayn asked, raising a smooth eyebrow. Harry wanted to say no. He wasn't alright at all. For the first time in his life he was seeing colour and it was pretty much overwhelming every other one of his senses. Two little dots of blue. Blue. Were dulling the world around him and he was definitely not alright. 

"No, actually I feel a little sick. I think I'm gonna go home." He moved to grab his bag before anyone could try and stop him and with one last unbelieving look at Louis' eyes he was out the door.

They had told him he would never see colour - so how could they explain what he saw when he looked at the new kid. Unless what he was seeing wasn't actually colour and was something else entirely. 

He shook the thought away. He knew, deep in the bottom of his gut that what he saw was true. The impossible had happened and he didn't know what he was supposed to do with that. It wasn't like he saw everything that was blue, just a pair of startling eyes and nothing more. So what did it mean?

Harry walked home in a daze. He saw everything differently, he was filled with so many questions. How many of the cars that passed him were blue? How many sweet wrappers or t-shirts or jeans? Most jeans were blue weren't they? How many people that he walked by had eye's to match the new kid's?

His head swam with the possibilities until it froze on one certainty.

As he entered the gate leading a path to his house, Harry bypassed the front door and made straight for his back garden. Leaving his bag by the back door he seated himself in the middle of the small grass patch before lying down and closing his eyes. He spent long minutes recalling everything he could remember about the colour blue. The speckles of different tones, the twinkling glow resting behind the colour, the brightness in his otherwise dull world.

And then he opened his eyes.

For an instant the colour in his mind bled into the sky and for one microsecond he knew what it would be like to be surrounded in blue. He knew, for the first time, what he would see if colours were a gift he had received with his birth.

Slowly the edges started to fade and for the first time he had something to miss. 

"Hey," Harry turned towards the voice disturbing his thoughts and smiled at Niall as he sat down beside him. "You left pretty quick,"

"I had a headache so I thought it best if I just came home." He smiled charmingly at his blond friend, whose brow furrowed in return.

"You said you felt sick..."

"Oh.. yeah I did.. must have been a migraine." Harry pulled himself up into a sitting position and ignored the feeling of loss he felt in his chest. The shades and tones causing a dull ache that was new and painful. There was a part of him that wished he had never met Louis and had never seen colour at all because now he was lost to it. He looked for it everywhere and found it nowhere and ignorance really was bliss.

"Is everything ok mate?" Niall asked, obvious worry lacing his tone. He stretched out a hand to grip Harry's shoulder and squeezed as he spoke. "Is this about Louis?" 

For a fleeting second Harry contemplated telling Niall everything. Maybe if he talked it through with someone he could work out what to do. Maybe two heads were better than one just like they say. However somehow he couldn't find the words. There was a part of him that wanted to keep it to himself. It was like a special secret that was his alone, and if Harry were honest he was scared that if he said it aloud he'd find out it wasn't true. 

"I just don't think we need anyone new in our group Ni," the words left his lips before he could even think about what he was saying and Niall's look of displeasure unsettled him. He wasn't exactly lying but it was becoming obvious that if his friend had anything to do with it Louis was going to become a permanent fixture. 

"He really isn't a Brian Haz! He's really funny and he has a great voice." Niall nudged at Harry's shoulder, knowing how much singing meant to the slightly younger boy. "The other's seem to like him."

And that was that really. If his friends liked him then Louis was there to stay. Which meant so were his eyes. Harry was filled with a mixture of excitement and dread. "Then I'm sure he's great!" He smiled briefly, mentally kicking himself for not opening up and sharing his problem when he had the chance. 

Harry rose from his seat on the grass, he must have been there a while if Niall had turned up after choir, and held out a hand to Niall. "You staying?"

"Of course! Pizza?" Harry rolled his emerald eyes but nodded. 

"Great! While we wait you can tell me all about how you plan to steal Holly away from Connor?" Harry started for a second, he hadn't thought about Holly all afternoon, which was certainly unlike him.

"You don't think my natural charm will be enough?" The pair joked about Harry's luck with the ladies as they made their way into the house and Harry forced himself to forget about the days revelations and focused instead on doing the things he was used to; eating pizza and watching movies.

***

Harry arrived early to his Sociology class in the hope of catching sight of Louis' eyes as he entered the room. After a night filled with dreams tinted blue he needed to know that it was real. That he hadn't been making it up or dreaming it, that it wasn't just a one time deal. Or maybe, actually he wanted the opposite of that.

The whole thing was clouding his thoughts. He barely spoke to the boys on their walk in and when Holly had approached him during registration he could barely concentrate enough to flirt. All he could think about was Louis and his god-damned fucking eyes. 

Which was why his own gaze was plastered to the door in wait. He felt so out of control, like his life was spinning around him and he couldn't make it stop. His world had literally been turned upside down and he wanted more or even less just to make it steady. Because if he saw the new kid today and he didn't have eyes of blue, that would be ok. Harry would be devastated to have his one glimpse of colour taken away but at least he could get over it. He knew in time he would forget. He almost didn't want to see because having only a slither of it was worse than not having it at all. Maybe.

Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on which way you look at it, when Louis walked into the room and scanned for his seat, Harry wasn't drawn in by his eyes. Not because they were a familiar shade, no, they were still their startling blue but this time they were out-shadowed. By the Blue lines of Louis' t-shirt.

Before the thought could materialise Harry shot out of his chair, grabbed his bag from the floor and marched over to Louis who was just about to take his seat. In a swift movement that surprised them both Harry hooked a large hand around Louis' smaller bicep and propelled them both out of the classroom and down the hall to a storage closet he had used once or twice with previous girlfriends. 

"Whoa, mate, what's going on?" Louis asked, his eyes impossibly large and full of colour as he pulled his arm away from the incessantly tight grip. He flexed his fingers firmly on his bag-strap, a last ditch effort to make himself feel in control.

Harry tore his stare away from the strips of colour and narrowed his gaze. He couldn't let himself be distracted. He had to know what was going on. 

"Who are you?" Harry demanded, accusation nipping at his words causing Louis to tilt his head and raise an eyebrow.

"We met yesterday right? I'm Louis... Tomlinson... I met you in choir?" Louis looked at Harry expectantly, hoping the curly haired boy would realise who it was and stop acting so crazy. The last thing he needed on his second day of college was to trapped in a closet with a nutcase.

"No I meant... what are you doing to me?" Harry spoke with a firm vulnerability. Why was it only Louis that he could see colours around? What was this new kid doing to him? Why was he so special? Was he using some kind of witchcraft? Sorcery? It was a silly notion, he realised this, but what else was he supposed to think? It was the only illogical conclusion.

"I think the real question is what are you doing to me? Weren't you the one that just dragged me from Sociology and into a closet. Which actually is quite ironic." Louis smiled, his lips caught in a laugh at his own joke. Oddly it was all that was needed to clear the fog in Harry's head and as he ran a nervous hand through his curls, which admittedly were less styled than usual, he realised what he idiot he may have appeared to be.

"Look... no... Just forget it yeah." And just as quick as Harry had dragged Louis into the storage room he left it, slamming the heavy wooden door in his wake.

He made his way to the back of the Science building, easily deciding that class was not for him. He couldn't concentrate so what was the point of going? He needed to clear his head. 

Unsurprisingly the space was empty and he threw his bag onto the ground before laying down and resting his head against it. He had one period before he would be joined by the others and he hoped that was enough to get his act together. He couldn't let the fact that he was seeing colour around the new kid cloud his judgement. He had to work out what was going on but he needed a level head to do so.

Purposefully blanking his mind Harry counted in deep breaths until he was somewhere between sleep and not. It was peaceful. Numbing. It was the only reprieve he had gotten since yesterday afternoon.

"You asleep Harry?" At some point he must have crossed the line and he stirred at the voice. He turned his head as he pried open his eyes and smiled slowly up at Liam as he joined Harry on the grass. 

"Was. Good day?"

"It was alright yeah... there was this girl in free period - " Their conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Zayn who swung his bag down before searching his pockets for a lighter to light the cigarette hanging from his lips. He grinned when he reached success and he sucked onto the tip before turning his attention to the two waiting boys.

"Alright lads?" he asked as he sat down beside Liam, "you feeling better Haz? you were quite this morning."

There was obvious concern in his friend's eyes and Harry hated it. He was cocky at times, a little selfish, somewhat inappropriate but he knew he had good friends and he didn't like them worrying about him over nothing. At some point he would tell him. As soon as he could get a handle on it himself.

"Still feel a bit sick, but I'm alright. Liam was just gonna tell me about a girl he met in free period." Harry wiggled his eyebrows and felt more like himself than he had all day.

"Well I didn't actually meet her as such," Liam blushed and ducked his head. It was no secret that he wasn't very good with girls but that wasn't through lack of interest on either side.

"Li!" Zayn exclaimed around the burning stick in his mouth, "We've talked about this. No more pining yeah. After the disaster that was Stacey you promised to actually talk to the next girl you liked."

"Stacey wasn't a disaster.."

"You practically stalked her mate.."

"I didn't stalk her!"

"Really? Roses in her locker, creepy love notes slipped into her bag, memorising her timetable so you could walk her to class without her knowing.."

"Fuck off Zayn!"

"Liam you wound me!"

Harry laughed as his friends pushed at each other, until Niall rounded the corner with the new kid trailing behind him.

"Hey guys, you don't mind Louis sitting with us right?" There was a chorus of 'of course not's' and Harry dragged himself into a sitting position. Niall sat himself down next to Zayn, already searching his bag for his lunch, leaving the only space next to Harry. Which Louis promptly filled. 

Harry tried desperately to ignore the boy beside him but the lines of blue were seeping into his peripheral vision and he just wanted to look. He wanted to take it all in. He wanted to compare the blue on the shirt to the blue of the eyes. He wanted to stare and memorise and see. 

"Hey," there was a nudge to his side and Harry held his breath as he turned towards the speaker, stealing himself for the flash of colour.

"Hi." He choked as his eyes followed the stripes before looking into identical pools of blue.

"I was thinking we could start over. Because I'm really not that bad, some people even think I'm funny and I really like your friends and I'm new so I don't want to have to find new ones that I'll like less you know." Louis finished his rambling spiel with a smile and an out-stretched hand. Harry paused for a moment, unsure of what to say in response, before taking the offered hand in his and opening his mouth to agree.

Only he never got that far. Because as soon as his skin met Louis' a sharp electric buzz invaded his flesh and travelled along his arm. He gasped as goosebumps appeared in wake of the shock of lightening making it's way up his neck, his cheeks, his ears and then sparked just behind his eyes.

Needless to say Harry had never felt anything like it. His head started to swim as the world swirled around him, moving faster and faster until he was forced to close his eyes and fall backwards to the grass. His hands clutched the prickly blades as he desperately tried to ground himself. 

It took what felt like hours for the spinning to stop but when he did he realised that his heart was beating furiously and his friends were shouting his name and slapping at his skin. Harry breathed deeply wondering what had happened. Had he passed out? Was that just a super charged electric shock?

He waited until his heart steadied and his fingers loosened before opening his eyes and when he did -

"Fuck,"

Because he could see the colour of the sky and it wasn't fading away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try and update this and The Rainbow Inn alternatively but hopefully it won't take so long next time!
> 
> Thanks for reading :)  
> x


	4. Chapter Three

The blue was still there a week later. As was Louis. The blue eyed boy had managed to ingrain himself firmly into the small group of friends and Harry was finding it increasingly hard to deal with. He found he was fighting himself on so many levels. 

For one he would be an idiot if he hadn't recognised that both 'colour' instances had happened around Louis. The first from just the boy's appearance and the second from his touch. Which left him torn. Because on the one hand he itched to touch him again - just to see what would happen, but on the other he was scared. He hadn't seen colour for so long that he was almost terrified of getting it all back. Blue alone was completely overwhelming and even days later still left him breathless. 

As it was he was overloaded with information he hadn't had before. Like the fact that there wasn't only one definition of blue. Almost every blue he had seen was different. For instance the sky was a few shades lighter than the colour of his favourite slushy and his History teacher seemed to have a penchant for blue socks that ranged in tone every time Harry noticed them peaking out from under his well pressed cords. And it wasn't like Harry couldn't notice, he saw everything tinged with the colour - bottle caps, hair clips, forgotten sweet wrappers. No matter how big or small he was drawn to it. He couldn't not notice it, even if he didn't want to.

He had soon found out Zayn's trainers had dark blue Nike ticks and Liam's iPhone cover had light blue around the edges. He found out that Louis wasn't the only one with cerulean eyes (he was fed up of saying the word blue in his head so had looked up other names he could use) but so did Niall - although his were somehow brighter, almost sparkling - and Holly. 

Holly. He liked to think of her eyes as azure in colour. For no other reason than that he found the word as pretty as her. In fact he named all the blues connected to her azure because somehow it fit. It fit her one blue bangle nestled between colours he couldn't see and it matched the bird pin holding up the soft tendrils of her auburn hair. Seeing specks of blue, azure, beaming from her person just made him like her more. 

And it was a good excuse for him to spend more time with her. Put in a little more effort. Harry knew she had a boyfriend but he wasn't stupid. Girls liked him. Girls liked him a lot. His track record said so. And it was really only a matter of time before Holly would succumb to his charms. She was already laughing at his jokes and touching his elbow when they talked. He was sure she wouldn't do that if she was secure in her relationship with whatever his name was.

Of course spending time trying to pull Holly also gave him the excuse he needed to avoid his friends. Not that he was avoiding them exactly, or rather not fully, but he was definitely making an effort not to spend as much time with them in light of Louis being with there constantly and the recent events surrounding him.

In fairness if anyone had noticed that he hadn't been turning up until ten minutes before he had to leave again then they never said anything to him. He would get the occasional odd stare from the new addition but other than that he still spent time with Niall in free period and he still walked home with Liam and Zayn and he still attended choir - so actually, ok, he wasn't doing a very good job of avoiding them at all. 

Of course he had contemplated telling them what was happening to him, but how did you find the words for something like that. It was like vampires and werewolves, people may find them interesting, enjoy reading about them and watching, but nobody believed they were real. There was no proof that they were real. Just like they'd be no proof that what he was saying was true. Because although he was sure his friends would be supportive and talk it out with him, would they really believe it? did he even really believe it? and how was he going to explain that Louis somehow had everything to do with what was happening to him?

Harry actually spent a lot of time trying not to think or talk about Louis. It was to be expected that the boy was constantly in his thoughts but it unnerved him none the less. Never had he spent so much time thinking about the colour of a boy's eyes or the way he felt when they touched. He knew it was only because of what had happened but he felt unsettled and that may have been another reason he was avoiding, or at least trying to avoid, his friends.

He thought about the irony of his thoughts as he pushed his way through the choir room door and towards his group, all four standing together and watching as he approached.

"Haz! Long time no see mate!" Zayn greeted as Harry slung his bag to the floor and joined them, deliberately ignoring Louis' stare.

"Come on Zayn, we saw him at lunch," Niall defended, a twinkle in his eyes. "Or at least I think we did - somewhere between the sixth bite of my sandwich and the eighth I think."  
Harry rolled his eyes and ignored the hint of guilt that settled in his chest. They had noticed after all and that made him feel worse than he was expecting.

"You know how it is - I had a better offer," Harry gave an over exaggerated wink and smirked causing the other's to laugh and shake their heads.

"Speaking of, how is Holly?" Liam nudged him and four sets of eyes stared at him questioningly. One pair more interested than the rest.

"She is already succumbing to my charms Li, it's only a matter of time."

"You know she has a boyfriend right? Big guy, probably won't like you for going after her?" Harry swung his stare to Louis, surprised that he had spoken as if they had been friends for years. He didn't like it. 

"I'm fully aware, thanks." There was a sharp bite to his tone but before anyone had a chance to call him on it and before he could truly absorb the way Louis' jaw tightened, Emma - their choir instructor burst through the door.

From there it was a quick succession of vocal warm-ups and then group performances they had been working on over the last week. Harry concentrated as much as possible on his own performance, glad to have Niall and Liam by his side, but quickly switched off when his turn was over. His phone provided easy distraction until the hour was up and he could go home and avoid the only blue that seemed to haunt him.

***

"Hi sweetie, how was school?" Harry's mum, Anne, was stirring pots in the kitchen as he kicked off his trainers by the garden door.

"College mum," he corrected with a roll of his eyes, moving to grab an apple from the fruit bowl. 

"Sorry." Anne smiled warmly. "How was college?"

"Fine."

"Just fine?"

"Yep." Harry continued to munch at the sharp fruit in his hand as he leant against the door of the fridge, his hip pressing firmly on the 'best mum' magnet he had brought when he was twelve.

"And how was choir?"

"Fine."

"The boys?" Harry sighed and tossed his finished apple core into the sink, a move that earned him a tutt.

"Everything and everyone is fine. Can you stop asking me now?" Anne turned from the stove and worried at her lip as she stared at her son.

"I'm just interested in your life Harry." 

"You just like to nag. You're always mothering me!" He rolled his eyes and ignored the flash of hurt in his mum's stare.

"That would be because I am your mother!" Anne stated, used to the distant son that was becoming more prominent. "You haven't been yourself all week. I'm worried and I am not going to apologise for caring about my only son!" 

Harry through back his head and took a deep breath. She wasn't wrong but what was he supposed to say? There was a reason he hadn't confided in her and it had nothing to do with him growing up or not loving her and everything to do with not wanting to become a test subject. He had been subjected to enough tests in his life already and he wasn't up for any more. At least not yet. If he got worried he would just google it or something. 

"I'm fine mum. Everything is fine." Harry took the fews steps that were separating them and leaned down to place a kiss on her cheek. He watched her shoulders relax and let the guilt eat at him for just a minute before he moved away. 

"You look really pretty today. I like your skirt." He threw the compliment over his shoulder as he left the kitchen and made his way to his room. It was true too. It was the same colour as some irises he had spotted on the walk home. It wasn't much but it eased his conscience somewhat to know he had left her with a smile instead of a frown. He was quickly coming to the realisation that he ought to tell someone what was going on before he alienated everyone he was close too. Either that or needed to hide his discomfort better.

Once in his bedroom he made quick work of pressing play on his paused iTunes playlist and changing into plaid pyjama bottoms and a labelled white t-shirt. It was getting tight around his growing frame and he liked the way it clung to his chest. 

He had a night full of homework to get done but that didn't stop him from checking his accounts on Facebook and Twitter, on which, to his surprise he found a plethora of mentions and posts between Louis and his friends. Maybe he had been better at the whole avoidance thing after all. 

In an attempt to ignore the rush in his head he posted on Holly's wall and commented on some of her recent pictures, although if he was honest with himself he wasn't completely as into it as he normally would have been.

Harry passed half an hour that way before settling down to his Sociology homework, which was primarily to read a couple of chapters and answer a few questions, nothing too taxing but definitely tedious, when he heard the knock at his door.

"Yeah?" He leaned back in his swivel chair as he awaited an answer only to be told he had a visitor waiting for him downstairs. Harry thought it odd that whoever it was was hadn't just come up to his bedroom as they usually did but hefted himself out of his seat and down the stairs to the front door.

"Don't be long honey, dinner's almost ready." His mum shouted as he opened the door and his answer was cut off when he saw who stood nervously waiting for him.

"What are you doing here?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so patient, sorry that not much happened but hopefully you'll stick around for more :)  
> x


	5. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so sorry! I hate myself so much right now because I haven't updated this since January! JANUARY!! like wtf? That's awful and I can only apologise profusely with this meager addition..  
> I have to say that I thought maybe I'd given up on this story, not on purpose, but because I've been feeling really inadequate with my writing lately and I haven't had time to work on that so.. idk.. I'd given up.  
> BUT the amazing thing is that you guys didn't! This hasn't been updated for 8 months and yet you were still reading, still leaving kudos, and comments and messages on my tumblr (me-a-cul-pa) and I just couldn't let this go, because you couldn't.  
> So thank you! so much! this is for everyone that left kudos recently and those of you left nudges in my inbox. Thank you  
> xx

“I came here to talk.” Louis huffed, hands on his full hips and determination in his blue, blue, eyes.

Harry had to force himself to breathe. The reminder of everything Louis had brought with him too much. Yes he’d seen the blue of Niall’s denim jeans but nothing compared to Louis’ eyes. They unnerved him. They were the first things he’d ever seen in colour and he had no idea why. Why Louis? Why now?

Finally he cleared his throat and forced himself to speak. “What for?”

“Seriously?” Louis laughed, shrill and incredulous, “Have you missed the part where you have been an utter brat to me since we met?”

“I think maybe you're being a little oversensitive.” Harry smirked in response, trying desperately not to show how on edge he was. Harry hated feeling lost. He was the confident one. He had been dealt a bit of shitty luck with the whole colour blindness thing but he owned it. He never let it faze him. Until Louis with his fucking blue.

“And I think you're being a prick.” Cobalt eyes darkened slightly in anger and the change was fascinating. 

They stood at a standstill, one fuming, one contemplating, before Louis broke the silence with a sigh. “Look. I like Niall and I like Liam and I like Zayn. So I'm not going anywhere. They’ve welcomed me into the group and if you don’t like it then either get over it or suck it up!”

“So do you want to come in?” Harry asked calmly, as though Louis’ rant had quite literally passed over his head. Louis’s jaw dropped in shock and a deep sense of satisfaction swelled in Harry’s chest.

“I.. why?” Louis' suspicion was almost palpable and Harry couldn't blame him. One minute they were arguing about Harry being an arsehole and then suddenly he wanted to hang out. 

It’s just, the way he saw it, maybe he could take advantage of the fact that Louis was around. Maybe if he got closer to the boy, spent more time with him, he could find out what the hell was going on. Maybe he'd find out why his life was suddenly blue and if it was going to be taken away again.

“I don't know, like you said, you aren't going anywhere so...”

Louis thought about it and Harry averted his eyes. He was going to have to stop staring, but there was something about Louis that 1, he didn't like 2, he was bloody scared of and 3, drew him in. He had tried keeping Louis at arm’s length and that clearly wasn't going to work so he'd try the opposite and hope for the best. He attempted to smile warmly but that only made Louis frown harder.

“Alright…”

Harry stepped back and angled his body to let Louis past, ignoring the brush of the other boy’s shirt against his as he did so. As the door shut everything felt suddenly smaller and Harry wondered whether he should have suggested they go elsewhere. He was exponentially feeling the pressure. Harry gestured, with a tilt of his head, for Louis to follow him and led the way up the hall stairs and into his bedroom. 

The silence felt thick and uncomfortable as he sat on his bed and gestured for Louis to do the same. The blue eyed boy looked uncertain and Harry realised that inviting Louis in was probably a pretty fucking stupid idea. 

“So, this is proper awkward yeah?” Louis sighed and his smile was lopsided. Like he knew the effect his words would have.

“Yeah, a bit, sorry.” Harry shrugged the perfect picture of nonchalance - an act he had practised for years - even though he felt the weight of the situation. 

Instead of sitting, Louis casually surveyed Harry’s room, pausing only to gaze at the handful of posters covering the dark walls.

“You like The Script?” He asked, a slim finger pointing to the tour poster above the bed.

“Who doesn't?” Harry shrugged again, and pushed back with his legs until he was against the headboard, his arms casually crossed over his chest. 

“My gran,” Louis grinned, full and wide, and Harry felt something inside him shift. Just a little, not much at all, but enough for him to notice. He pushed the feeling away, not wanting to analyse what it was. For all he knew it could have been the pasta he had for tea. That was a far more comfortable thought. He forced himself to turn his attention back to the boy with the flopped over fringe leaning against his wall.

“I, um, I went to see them a few years ago actually.” His tone was far less hostile and was awarded another grin.

“Me too! Amazing right? Best concert I've ever been to!”

“Have you been to many?” Harry loosened his arms and relaxed his shoulders, genuine interest laced his tone.

“Two, The Script included, don't ask about the other one!” Louis laughed and the sound echoed throughout the walls. Harry couldn't help but smile.

“No, come on, you have to tell me now!”

“Really, it's embarrassing for everyone involved. I really, REALLY, can't!” Louis moved slowly towards the bed as he chuckled and sat carefully on the edge. 

Harry thought about pressing further but didn’t want to scare Louis off when he had him so close. This boy with the wide smile might have all the answers Harry needed and he couldn’t risk it now. He really needed to think it all through though because deciding on the spot to befriend Louis was proving difficult.

They fell into silence, Louis continuing to look around from his seat on the bed and Harry watching him do so. Harry wasn’t sure what he should say to the boy. Their friendship thus far had been a little tumultuous – and although Harry was popular and charming and generally didn’t give a shit, he had never been in a situation quite like this one.

“You stare at me a lot you know?” Louis stated as he pushed himself back further on the bed and crossed his legs in front of him. 

“What?” Harry dragged his eyes away and instead studied his fingers as they picked at the ripped knee of his jeans.

“You stare, a lot.”

“I don’t think I do.” He tried for his usual nonchalance but even he could tell it was lacking.

“You do. It’s quite weird mate.” A smile tugged at the corner of Louis’ mouth and Harry wanted to wipe it off. What was he supposed to say? Was he supposed to say ‘yes Louis I stare because your eyes are blue and I’ve never seen colour before’? Somehow he thought that would be a little weirder than the staring.

“You’re weird.” Harry mumbled, not his best work but he wasn’t about to dig a hole for himself by addressing the issue. Not that it mattered as Louis merely laughed at him. He seemed to do that a lot. “Look, I don’t like change. I’ve been friends with those lads for years so forgive me if I don’t like that you just turned up and tried to muscle your way into the group.”

Louis opened his mouth to speak but Harry continued. “But I’m trying yeah? This is me trying. The lads like you; you insist that I’m not going to get rid of you, so I’m trying.”

“Alright.”

“Ok.”

“You have any films?” Louis asked as he flopped backwards, arms cushioned behind his head.

“I have Netflix,” 

The two fell into easy silence as Harry leaned across the bed to grab his laptop from the side table, while Louis shuffled about on the mattress until he was beside Harry, his back against the headboard. Harry kept a small distance between them and set the laptop at their knees, choosing the first film that was recommended when he logged on to watch.

Surprisingly it wasn’t as awkward as he thought it would be. They tended to laugh at the same parts and he didn’t mind Louis’ near constant narrative too much. It actually helped to build their so called friendship as Louis spoke of his sisters and the friends he had to leave behind when he moved.

He was warming up to the boy quicker than he had thought, but nothing helpful jumped out of their early conversations. Through all of his talking Louis never mentioned having magic or being involved in some kind of voodoo and as far as Harry could tell he wasn’t from a long line of gypsy’s, so he was no closer to having any answers than he had been a couple of hours ago.

As the credits rolled, Harry was saved from any potential awkwardness by sudden movement at the other side of the bed. Louis was hunched over the side, putting on the converse he had kicked off at some point.

“Thanks. For the movie. It was good to get to know you a bit yeah.” Louis said as he straightened, looking down at Harry still laid out in his spot. His curly head nodded his agreement. He couldn’t explain why but he was struggling to find the words to speak. Something was tightening in his chest and he knew it couldn’t be because Louis was leaving. He wanted the other boy to leave so, no, it couldn’t be that. But then what was it? Maybe his sense of failure? He hadn’t truly gotten anywhere. Whatever it was he didn’t like it, and it was just another thing he could list in regards to the conundrum that was Louis.

“Yeah, no problem. We’ll have to do it again with the rest of the lads.” The words left his mouth before he had a chance to think them through but Louis’ resounding smile suggested that he had said the right thing.

Harry saw Louis out, with a promise to see him at lunch, and walked sluggishly back up to his room. It had been a tiring day and all he wanted to do was put in his ear phones, turn up some Tom O’Dell and sleep. Which he fully planned on doing as soon as he was more comfortable.

He shucked off his clothes quickly, kicking them into the corner by the door for his mum to collect, until he was in just his boxers. 

His routine was simple. Toilet, teeth, face, bed. He was good at going through the motions. He was a creature of habit and he did these mundanely familiar things on auto-pilot. Which was way he didn’t notice until step three. Which was ridiculous because he practically bore a hole in the mirror while brushing his teeth.

But no. It was step three that made his palms sweat. It was step three that made his heart race. It was drying his face with a fucking towel and catching his reflection in the mirror that made the inside of his head thrum and his jaw drop. 

Because it was at the end of step three that Harry caught a hint of colour. A hint of colour that wasn’t blue, but green. 

Green.

Bloody green! He wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry because if he thought looking into Louis’ eyes and seeing colour was life changing, then he had completely underestimated the power and emotion of seeing the colour of his own eyes for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well....   
> Again, thank you for sticking with me - I hope it was worth it!  
> xx


	6. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *hides behind the Christmas tree I haven't taken down yet*
> 
> I'm just going to leave this here....

Two weeks. Well two weeks give or take a few days. But still, two weeks and nothing. After making amends with Louis and seeing the colour of his own eyes for the first time in his life, nothing had happened. The only green he saw was in the mirror and it was driving him insane.

  
It was all Harry could think about. When was the next piece of colour going to make itself available? Was this it? Was he only ever going to see blue and a splash of green? It was almost worse than the before. At least then he hadn't known what colour could really do. He hadn't appreciated all the different shades and tones. He hadn't known what life a little colour could bring to something. He wasn't constantly on edge waiting for more.

  
He had at first thought Louis was the problem. The catalyst as such. Everything had seemed to start when he arrived in Harry's life and he couldn't forget the first time they touched. The dizziness, the blinding wash of colour. But Harry had spent the last two weeks with Louis, even going so far as to sit next to him in sociology and nothing. No more green. No more anything. So he was left to conclude that maybe it wasn’t him. Maybe Louis had nothing to do with the colour breathing light into the dark. Maybe it was all a big coincidence.

  
That left Harry with nothing. No leads. If it wasn’t Louis then what was it? Nothing else had changed, other than the start of school and he’d been there for weeks already without any changes. So maybe this was it. This was all he was going to get, blue and a little green.

  
It was torture. And although he may have thought at one point that seeing colour was a gift, right now it was more of a nightmare. After all they called it ignorant bliss for a reason and overall he had been happier when he hadn’t known what he was missing.

  
“Harry… Haz!” he forced himself back to the present and lifted his head at Zayn as he threw a pencil in his direction.

  
“Yeah?”

  
“Did you hear what I said?”

  
“Nooo…” Zayn rolled his eyes at Harry’s drawn out answer.

  
“What is with you mate? You’ve been spacing all day. We missed you at lunch.” That it wasn’t the first time Harry had missed lunch with his friends the past week went unsaid. As did what he was really doing with that time.

  
“Sorry, had something to do.” He deliberately kept his tone light and carefree. He wasn’t ready to talk about what was on his mind and it was obvious that his friends were starting to pick up on his absence.

  
“And would that something be Holly?”

  
“Huh?” Harry scrunched his face in confusion. What did Holly have to do with anything? Weirdly he hadn’t thought about her since their first day back.

  
“Jesus Haz,” Zayn rolled his eyes a second time, an obvious tell of his frustrations that left Harry feeling only a little guilty. He had been so self-absorbed the last week that he hadn’t been paying attention to anything other than the unique situation he had managed to land himself in. “Holly and Connor broke up at the weekend, I thought you might have had something to do with that.” Eyebrows waggled and Harry puffed out a laugh.

  
How had he missed that? He been after Holly for almost a year and suddenly he was too into his own shit to notice that she was single? It was almost like a cup of cold water to the face. Colour had taken over his life. And without his bloody permission. He was quite happy going about his day, flirting, partying, hanging out with friends and suddenly he had just forgotten it all, because of a piece of fucking blue, oh and a speck of green.

  
He had been so consumed that he was eating lunch in the library, pouring through books in an attempt to find answers, so consumed that he had put Holly fucking Spencer on the back burner when he had been inadvertently chasing her for a year. Her and her ‘auburn’ hair and ‘yellow’ flower buttons. The colours didn’t matter. She was beautiful and he had been side-tracked by something that wouldn’t change her beauty. So he didn’t know the shade of her hair? It didn’t detract from the oval of her face and the plumpness of her lips. He had let himself get carried away, obsessive about something that overall, in the grand scheme of life meant nothing. Not to most people anyway and he was happy before, without the blue and the poxy green. He could be happy again. With Holly. Who was now single.

  
Harry grinned. It felt good. As though he was back on track. This he could do, he could reap the benefits of months of quiet flirting and hang out with his friends and enjoy choir and not step foot in the bloody library every again if he could help it. Because so what? He could see a little colour and it had happened suddenly and knocked him off his feet for a while but it wouldn’t change his life. Not in any real way. He was still colour blind Harry, just less so.

  
“So tell me about the break up..” Zayn laughed and clapped a hand across Harry’s back, which he took as a sign of approval. It was ok. He could get his life back and he knew where to start.

  
***

  
Harry walked with renewed swagger across the playing field. He felt good. He was back. Holly was in his sights and that was the only thing that mattered.

  
He hadn’t been able to catch her in between classes but it was a well known fact that she and her friends hung out at the playing field most nights. Harry had been a few times before so finding them within the three aches of ground was easy.

  
Harry had thought about getting the lads to come along but had decided it was best to fly solo. He had a purpose and he wasn’t worried or put off by how obvious that purpose may be.

  
The night air was crisp and Harry blew what little warmth he had into his cupped hands before jamming them into his waist length biker jacket. Once in view, easily finding Holly occupying the swings with her fried Sarah, he donned a large charming grin and walked to meet them, stopping to lean against the cold metal of the frame.

  
“Harry?” Holly was both surprised and happy to see him, which he counted as a win. “What are you doing here?”

  
He shrugged, “I heard about you and Connor, just wanted to check that you were ok.” Sarah knowingly rolled her eyes before gesturing her departure to join the rest of the group a few yards away on the climbing frame.

  
“Oh, thanks. That’s really sweet Harry.” Holly battered her lashes just a couple of times and nodded shyly. She was a sweet girl, her coyness something he had noticed about her straight away.

  
“So are you?... ok?” He reached forward to twist a tendril of her hair, ignoring the twinge he felt at missing the colour. It was auburn, apparently, and auburn was a type of red. Red. Whatever the hell red was… he stopped his train of thought. It had no place with him anymore. He didn’t care about colour, he cared only about getting his life back to normal.

  
“Yeah, I’m ok. It was long time coming I think.” Harry moved to stand before her, hands reaching to clasp the metal links holding the swing in place. He gave a gentle push and smiled as Holly’s giggle filled the air around them.

  
“Really? I thought you guys were pretty solid.” Harry pushed back and forth, back and forth, easing any tension the line of conversation might have caused.

  
“We were. For a while, but you know… we’re young and we wanted different things.” Holly’s stare hinted that he just may have been one of those ‘different things’. He was definitely ok with that.

  
“I have a confession to make.” He whispered the words between them, pushing the swing back until Holly had no choice but to stand before him, head tilted to meet his gaze.

  
“You do?” Holly asked breathlessly, completely hooked on the man in front of her.

  
“I do. I’m actually kind of pleased you broke up with Connor.”

  
“Yeah?”

  
“Yeah. I just think that he wasn’t good enough for you.” In truth Harry didn’t know Connor well enough to know what kind of guy he was, just that he had been in the way and now he wasn’t.

  
“And do you know anyone? That would be… good enough for me?”

  
“I might.”

  
Harry leaned in slowly, relishing the moment. He had been building up to this for months and he was finally about to take what he wanted. Her small hands clutched at his waist as she tipped her face towards him and it was all the consent that he needed. Raising his hands to frame the soft column of her throat he brushed their lips together.

  
Harry had kissed enough girls to know there was no such thing as a spark, no electric fusion, no sudden knowledge of destiny. But it was nice. It was a kiss like many others and it was nice.

  
He let his hands slide down to her waist and held her closer, enjoying the feeling of her slight body pressed close to his own.

  
Holly responded in kind, opening her lips for him, letting him delve inside and take the kiss further, emitting tiny little kitten moans that showed her enjoyment. It was something Harry was in control of and he liked it.

  
He was the one to break apart, happy with the fill he had taken. He smiled down at her, triumphant, proud of meeting his goal and she answered with a grin, her colourless eyes so bright and happy and wistful.

  
But something was niggling at the back of his mind. Something was screaming at him that this wasn’t right. And it wasn’t the lack of colour in her gaze, it was the lack of blue.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can only apologise *AGAIN* and thank you for sticking with me and this story. It amazes me how many people have liked this and commented on it and I'm sorry I'm not better... I want to be but I guess I just suck.
> 
> Not sure it was worth the wait... but thank you 
> 
> xx


	7. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the formatting - the archive didn't want to play ball :(  
> Also I noticed a mistake about Holly's eyes so i will edit as son as I can xx

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh, wow. Do my eyes deceive me or has it been just over a month since I last posted and not six?? yay me!!  
> As always I honestly could not do this without your kudos and comments, they keep me going and make me want to be better for you. A special thank you my 'iloveyou' anon. The fact that you take the time out to write those little messages just for me means a hell of a lot. I love you.  
> Hope you like it... hopefully I'm kind of back in the swing of it a bit now.  
> xx

“Sorry mate, I don’t get it.”

  
“Niall, for fucks sake!” Harry rubbed at his temples as Niall shrugged sheepishly. They had been going over it for hours. Harry had repeated himself three times and he was seriously regretting thinking it was a good idea to go to Niall. Maybe Liam would have been a better choice. Actually, Liam definitely would have been a better choice. What had he been thinking?

  
“Sorry. Just. Ok. You kissed Holly?” Harry groaned, loudly, and let himself fall back onto his bed. With deep breaths he counted to 5 before answering.

  
“Yes.”

  
“Ok. Which is good right? I mean you’ve kind of been after her for ages.”

  
“Yep.” He popped the ‘p’ and if Niall noticed his exasperation it didn’t stop him continuing.

  
“But?”

  
“Niaaaall!” Harry covered his eyes with the crook of his elbow and groaned. This was not helping. He wanted advice and he was getting nothing but annoyed.

  
“I’m sorry!” Niall laughed and reached out a foot from the chair he was sitting on to kick at Harry’s knee. “Seriously. Just one more time ok. It’s just a little hard for me to take in.”

  
Harry sat up quickly, his hair in stuck up strands, and flung his arms out widely. “It’s hard for you to take in? You? How the hell do think it is for me to take in? I haven’t seen colour my whole life and I’ve been fine and then suddenly I can see blue and the colour of my eyes –“

  
“Green,” Niall interrupted.

  
“Yes green! I can see green and now nothing is enough! I want to see more. I need more colour! I kissed Holly Niall. Holly! I’ve been putting in the groundwork to have a chance with Holly for over a year and when I do it’s not enough. She’s not enough. So what the fuck am I supposed to do?” Harry stared forlornly at one of his best friends, just praying that he was going to say something. Something that would change everything. Something to help.

  
“And it started with Louis?”

  
“It did.”

  
“This all sounds really crazy Haz.” Although his tone was sad it wasn’t necessarily unbelieving. And he wasn’t wrong. It did sound crazy; Harry himself thought it was crazy, so how could he fault Niall for feeling the same way. The difference, however, was that to Harry it was real. Crazy or not he was living it.

  
“I know. But if it wasn’t true how would I know that your eyes are blue?” Harry questioned. Almost desperate to prove his sanity, and not just to Niall.

  
“Well, in fairness I’ve told you that before.”

  
“Ok,” Harry scanned the room, taking a quick inventory of what he could see, “alright, that t-shirt hung over the radiator is blue, so is the crisp packet on the floor next to the bin and also the logo on your t-shirt and the tick on your trainers. Though the tick is darker. That magazine on the desk? The girl is wearing blue suspenders and –“

  
“Alright alright. I get it. I believe you. Shit.” Niall exhaled a deep breath and nodded slowly to himself. There was nothing more Harry could do. Not now. What other way could he prove that what he was saying was true? “What about the green?”

  
“The only green I can see are my eyes.”

  
“Nothing else?”

  
“Nope.” Harry scratched at his scalp as he popped his ‘p’ once again.

  
“And it comes gradually and started with Louis?” Harry released a frustrated sob.

  
“Niall I have literally told you this three times and the last time was only twenty minutes ago. You are seriously pissing me off right now!”

  
“Jesus, Harry. It’s a lot to take in ok? I’m trying here but maybe I just need to hear it one more time.” The pair sighed and Harry nodded in agreement.

  
“Maybe we should have done this down the pub.” Niall laughed but they both knew that alcohol wouldn’t have made the situation any better.

  
“It started when I saw Louis in choir for the first time. He turned around and his eyes were blue. Just his. So I freaked out and came home. Next day I can see the blue in his shirt and then we shake hands and I can see blue everywhere.” He shrugged. He knows what it sounds like. He knows what Niall is going to say.

  
“And your eyes?” Niall asked, eyes working hard to piece together the invisible puzzle Harry was laying out before him.

  
“Happened after Louis came over to hang out.”

  
“I hate to say it mate but the cause seems pretty obvious.” Niall shrugged and stared at him pitifully.

  
“I know. But it doesn’t make sense. It all comes back to him but why? Why him? What has he done to make me see colour? Because I’ve thought it over again and again and I can’t figure it out.”

  
The two lapse into silence, lost in their own thoughts. If he was honest then he could admit that yes, he did feel a little better having talked about it. It gave him the chance to offload and maybe, possibly see things from a different perspective. But it hadn’t really helped. Because together they had only come up with the conclusion that he had made by himself. Louis was some kind of catalyst and no matter how hard he tried to ignore it, or convince himself that that couldn’t possibly be the case, it was. Because nothing else fit. There was no other coincidences and when he listed it out for Niall that was ridiculously obvious. For whatever reason, Louis Tomlinson brought colour into his life and now he just needed to work out what to do next.

And he wasn’t holding out for any genius ideas from Niall if the last few hours were anything to go by.

  
“Have you told the others?”

  
“No.”

  
“Are you going to?”

  
“Not if it’s going to take three bloody hours, no.” Niall grinned and kicked at Harry again, getting a knock back in return.

  
“Prick.”

  
“A big one they say,” Harry winked but the playfulness neglected to reach his eyes. It was all such a roller coaster ride. One minute he is literally colour blind, the next he’s not. One minute he’s obsessed over Holly, the next he’s not. One minute he is sure that this all has something to do with Louis Tomlinson invading his life and then the next he’s not, but then he is again. One minute he wishes it would all go back to the way it was and the next he only wants to go forward.

  
He feels so erratic. His thoughts and feelings don’t make sense. He doesn’t know what to do with them and sharing them, after what had happened with Holly the night before, seemed to be the best solution. Only all it really achieved were two confused people instead of one.

  
“I think,” Niall interrupted, “you need to spend some time with Louis. See what happens, maybe tell him?”

  
“Yeah.” It was the same conclusion that he had drawn himself, only he had no intention of telling Louis any of what was going on with him. Not yet anyway.

  
“Pizza?” Harry laughed. If Niall was thinking about food then the discussion was definitely over. And he was ok with that. He could do with a distraction.

  
“Chinese?” He countered.

  
“Deal!”

  
***

  
Harry spent the weekend going over his options. And then going over them some more. He had received a few texts from Holly, subtle flirting and requests to meet up, and although he answered her it felt more like playing along than any kind of real involvement.

  
He had somehow found himself in a very awkward position. And like many other things he pushed it as far back in his mind as he could get it.

  
Because currently his main concern was Louis.

  
He needed to get closer to him. Find out what happens if they spend time more time together, see if he would get more colour back. The problem was they had had a shaky start. Harry dragging Louis into a closet was hardly a strong base to build a friendship from, and yes they had hung out together since but not really that much. So it was proving hard. He was most definitely struggling to find a way in that wouldn’t make him seem as crazy as he felt.

  
Luckily the opportunity presented itself at the end of the day. He had managed to avoid Holly in their registration group, by walking in at the last minute, and again at lunchtime by avoiding the cafeteria and having Niall bring him out food. It was cowardly yes, but he needed time to figure out what to do. He didn’t want to throw everything away that he had with Holly just because something else was going on. What if he didn’t get anywhere with the whole Louis thing? He didn’t want to have missed his chance.

  
Choir had finished, a little later than usual because there had been some kind of emergency Mrs Hachett had had to attend to, and the five boys were leaving together when Louis gave Harry the opening he needed.

  
“I could have done without being late today.” Louis sighed as he followed his new friends through the main doors and out onto the green. He raked a hand through his hair before staring at his watch and Harry followed the movement with interest. The kind of interest he didn’t want to think about, like Louis’s nimble fingers.

  
“Why’s that Tommo?” Liam asked and Harry had to bite down on the laugh that was threatening to burst from his lips. Liam had thought of the nickname a week ago, clearly having derived it from Louis’s surname, and he couldn’t be prouder. He used it as much as he could and Harry was starting to get a little worried that it was actually going to stick.

  
“Told mum I’d watch the twins tonight while she worked, but I need to run to Tesco’s first otherwise I’ve got nothing to feed them. Gonna be cutting it pretty close.” Louis sighed and before Harry even took the information in his lips were moving. His brain obviously one step ahead of him.

  
“I could stop at Tesco’s for you if you want.” The group stopped. All four pairs of surprised eyes trained on him. Yes it was a little out of character but he had a higher purpose now and this was the open door he needed.

  
“What?” Louis blinked, probably the most surprised of them all.

  
Harry cleared his throat and soldiered on. “Give me a list and I can pop into Tesco’s then bring it by on my way home.” It actually did make sense, Harry wouldn’t have to go that far out of his way and he could maybe hang around a little once he’d dropped everything off to Louis.

  
“Are you sure you don’t mind?”

  
“Course.”

  
Louis grinned brightly, his eyes dancing and when Harry managed to drag his eyes away, he had a grin of his own. Because behind Louis’s smile was the green grass of the campus shining brightly, blinding him with the vast beauty of it.

“Great, thanks Harry. I’ll text you yeah.”

  
Harry barely noticed him leave, but nodded in response. Ignoring his friends questioning eyes and instead revelling in the new found colour, this time not just two little dots but a whole canvas.

  
Son of a bitch.

  
Louis Tomlinson was definitely at the centre of whatever was going on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it wasn't longer, I seem to be incapable of writing past 2000 words.  
> I would love to hear your thoughts on this and where you think it might go - also any things you are really hoping will happen because I'm kind of making this up as I go and they just might make it in.  
> thank you. again. for giving me a reason to write.  
> xx


	8. Service announcement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An announcement and a plea for help.

Hi everyone!

As you know I have been gone for a while and I really do apologise for that! I've been struggling with my writing for a while now and needed a break - however I finally feel like I am in a place where I can start again and that I would like to start with this story - as it really is close to my heart.

I had the intention to just carry the story on with the next chapter, however while reading it over again recently I feel that the story isn't what it could be. I don't think I've done it justice and I really want to.

So I have come to the decision to start again. The events and characterisations thus far will stay the same but I am going to edit and re-write it so that it becomes the story it deserves to me.

To help me do this, to help me take my time on it and really think it through, to give me new ideas and perspectives and to keep me motivated, I am on the look out for 2 or 3 beta readers.

So if you think you would like to help then please get in touch!

Thank you for all the support I had for this, I can't explain how much it meant.

xx


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